I won't give up

I'm here to stay and make the difference that I can make
We had to learn, how to bend without the world caving in.

Bureaucratic red-tapes, superiors/colleagues choosing to cover their asses aside, wayangstunts and all, sometimes we just have to roll with it. No, not acquiesce, but an understanding and acceptance that human aren't perfect and we're all living in a system run by humans. Yet while we accept, we don't give up the principles and values we hold so close to us. They are like an anchor in the mad world. A form of consistency for some shreds of sanity and hope.

Some choose to react strongly against it, at times, going the extreme of judging (authority, colleagues, even friends or family) harshly which ultimately got them all jaded and cynical. And who gets to benefit in the end? No one.

Because sometimes judging others and mulling over others' faults distracts you from the race you're running. Not to mention, sometimes, it stumbles others in their race too!

They do that, and while you may feel indignant or angry, perhaps it might be good at times to just pause and try to understand their actions from their positions. We are all just trying to function in an imperfect world. Don't give up on the potential of the goodness in people, give them a second chance. Don't choose to behave the same way you abhor years ago simply because you realized now it's easier that way. Don't let our pride get in the way.
Focus on giving our best in our work, continue to hold true to your beliefs and values, enjoy your life the way it is anyway, don't let all the nasty stuffs get you down.

Run the race, straight to the goal you've headed out for. Sometimes we fail, terribly, but don't give up. Don't let yourself say: "Oh heck, since I'm down already, there's no point anymore." And don't put others down or fault them relentlessly. Complain if you need to, but get back to it and continue to believe. Lastly, be stupid if you need to. :P

"For whoever wants to save their life will lose it, but whoever loses their life for me and for the gospel will save it." Mark 8:36

The Week thus far

I can't describe how it has been for me, it had been overwhelming. If I were to narrow down some of the emotions and experience I'm feeling, I would say excited, full of anticipation, and extremely invigorating. That is what teaching is to me.
Of course, it has only been a week. I am still really thankful for this path which God has brought me to. He had really held my hand and pointed me this way and I want to do my best for Him, no matter what everyone might say or however certain thing might threaten to tear your passion into shreds.

I am not sure what the future now holds for me. I personally have some will of my own, but it is in this precarious and uncertain situation that I learn how "yet not my will, but yours" Luke 22:42.
No matter how hard it is to tear myself away from here, I'll believe that in everywhere your purpose will be lived out through me somehow. God, just guide me along, and ease me into your will somehow, I would really hate to see blood or tears shed along the way.

And now, the battlefield.

Prac is finally starting in about .... 1.5 days time. While the trepidation begins, nervousness, some degree of fear and uncertainty, I know it was time to experience the real stuff- to head out in the battlefield and put all theories into practice.
It is really interesting but I have met people who enter this profession wanting to inspire and instill real changes, ending up saying all they want now is resilience, and to survive in this profession.

It can be a crushing realization to know that amidst our ideals and dreams, reality can really struck us and remind us that things are not always rosy and perfect. The key is to know what and who we are doing it for ultimately. Backstabbing colleagues, biased bosses, kids from hell aside, who are we actually serving, do we love the people we are trying to lead, what is the purpose behind why we are doing this?
Easier said than done, of course, but I guess that is why we need constant reminders and renewal from the Maker Himself.

I pray for love for these people whose lives I am going to touch, I pray for patience and diligence as I offer my knowledge and values to them, I pray for wisdom as I lead them to find a purpose in their lives, I pray for joy and encouragements that will keep me going everyday. I pray God, that I will do you proud.